Disconnected

Just got settled in.

I was at the New Parish in Oakland tonight for there, "Be Funny Open Mic" , and I was just not feeling it. I even had to stop myself in the middle of my set and talk about this really weird disconnect that I was feeling with the audience.

I'm pretty sure tonight's incident was all in my head. I'm at this really weird point in stand up comedy career where I still love doing it but at the same time I'm not enjoying it. Probably because it's not all challenging as it was from when I first started. Also, I did a lot of gay jokes tonight and while I was waiting for my bus home, it just made me feel all disgusted thinking about all the gay jokes I did like there ain't shit else about me other than gay gay gay.. gay gay ...

So tonight I made a conscience decision not to write anymore gay jokes. Maybe the future of comedy really is in the observational and shared human experience, I don't know? But one thing is for sure, I can't keep doing these gay jokes because it's hurting my soul.

So for now, this mean's I'm going to have to give up my Margaret Cho timing and start studying the Ellen Degeneres, Paula Poundstone, and Jerry Sienfelf stand up DVD's.

I know I can be super funny being clean and observational, I've just never given it a chance because well.. frankley it's fucking boring.

And since I am a man of the people, it's their will that I will cater too. And if the general public doesn't respond well to my new efforts, then fuck it, I'll go back to telling my gay dick jokes but not without giving it a sincere effort to move forward and evolve.

xoxo