Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Week 23, 24, 25, & 26

Today's Final Weigh in: ????????

I don't know and I don't wanna know, not in a bad way, I just decided to stop living my life by the scale.

I feel good and that's all that matters and hope everyone made got something good out've this last effort.

Thanks for doing it with me everybody!


Saturday, June 18, 2011

How to Pick Up a Gay Guy

Model: Benj Gutz

This blog is for all my socially inept gay men out there who don't know how to pick up other gay men other then in bushes or truck stop restrooms.

1) First, go to a place where Gay men gather... ie. Kathy Griffin comedy show, SF Gay Pride or a donut shop.

2) Next, carefully pick who you're most attractive guy near you, meaning pick somebody who looks like they have a nice job because we all know gay men are some money grubbin bitches.

3) Be prepared to act really fucking fake because if it's one thing gay men like, it's acting pretentious. Even though most gay men are middle class or below, the closest we'll ever come to being rich is acting fabulous.

4) If you still haven't approached your guy by now it's because you're not sure if he's interested in you or not. Quickly go to the jukebox and play a really sexy song and then make sure you dance right in front of him so he see's you moving and groovin your booty, then slowly turn around and make eye contact with him because chances are that he's probably sized up already while you were shaking the junk in front of him.

5) When you slowly turn around, make sure to keep eye contact with him and see if he's smiling, if he is then that's your cue to go in for the kill. Keeping your eyes locked on his eyes and then very seductly walk over to him and say "hi.. what's your name" , and I repeat... DO NOT DO NOT look at his crotch while you're walking over to him. This says to him that you're a horny slut and you're only interested in his dick, which you probably are. You have to remember, this guy gets hit on by dozens of gay cheap bitches like yourself nightly and if you want a chance with him then you're going to have to come up with something a little bit more original.

I know most gay men don't know what the word "original" means because we all act/talk/dress/sound/smell the same.

If all else fails and he still doesn't want to show you any love and you still want him really really bad, then politely go up to him and say, "this boy pussy isn't going to fuck itself" , and then walk away.

Because even though you're ass has already been dissed, you still get a chance to walk away with your dignity.

But like most gay men who can't take rejection well, if you totally want to show him he passed up on a good thing then totally start macking on the guy next to him to show him your bus stop cleary has more than one route on it.

Happy Dick Hunting ladies!



In all honestly, I completely don't know how to pick gay men, this blog is a sarcastic response to another post I saw online entitled, "How to Pick Up a Gay Guy" . And really this blog is about my experience's in the gay dating world.

Luvvvs yeah!!


Friday, June 17, 2011

Godfather Theme Song

Here's another clip from one of my favorite street performers - Jian Wei Luo.

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

Here's an entertaining saxophone rendition of "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" by one my favorite San Francisco street performers - Jian Wei Luo.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

22,000 hits bitches!

I just checked my overall hit counter and so far I have 22,000 hits from my blogs.

I am extremely humbled and grateful to anyone whose ever stopped by to read one of my blogs. I've said it before and I'll say it again, thank you.

Blogging is soooo competitive.

Bloggers are basically competing for your web interest viewing. Some have tapped into niche blogging like Perez Hilton, who does celebrity gossip, get a million hits a day and have turned into celebrity themselves . Wow, that's amazing.



Another famous blogger is Julia Powell, who cooked her way threw Julia Child's cook book, which eventually got made into a movie.



Not all great bloggers are famous, great blogging comes from a passion and a personal conviction to tell the world, "hey muther fuckers, this is what I like & if you don't like it, well then too bad because this is what I'm going to blog about bitches" ! Well okay maybe not to that extreme but I'm sure you guys get the point.

Look at local SF Comedian Charles OJ Patterson and his tumblr blog devoted to the emerging talent from the San Francisco Comedy scene, now that's passion. This blog is popular amongst locals comedians because the Bay Area community is such a tight knit bunch and we all enjoy hearing about each other's accomplishments and recent outings, I know I do.



So there you have it!

Happy Hunting on the net!


Thursday, June 9, 2011

Personal update

Hey guys, I've been slacking on my blogs for a while, meaning they've been becoming less and less personal. I'm sure some of you may have noticed by all the music blogs I've been posting lately. Which is fine because not all the time I don't feel the need to say anything profound.

Not that I do but still if I did, I'm sure it would become exhausting.

It's Thursday and I have a couple days off from work, which is nice but not when you have bills to pay. I'm hoping in the next coming weeks work will bring some economic relieft my way.

Let's see, what else is going on?

Oh okay, let's do this, let's go over the 5 major area's of my life:

1) Money - something of which I don't have a lot of right now. You know how people are always saying, if you want money to come into your life, you need to do something to attract it but first I need to figure out what I've been doing to keep it away. I wonder if attracting money into your life could be as easy as wearing the color green. If that were true, then Irish people would be Ga-zillionaires!

2) Love/Romance - I laugh at this topic! Ha! I'm pretty sure I've given up on finding the true love of my life. Tomorrow I'm going to Good Vibrations and I'm going to buy a big fuckin dildo and start jabbing myself, someone has to.

3) Food - Food is sooooo important to me. I love a good cheeseburger. I already miss all the chili cheeseburgers I ate while I was down in L.A. I went to the Castro this past week and ordered their version of a chili cheeseburger and I was sooo disappointed.

4) Career - As of now I'm looking for a 2nd job. My main thing is to save up for a car as soon as I get clear of debt. I put in for several jobs this past week on Craigslist so we'll see if I'm able to catch any leads. I know, can you guys believe it, I was actually on Craigslist and not looking for dick.

5) Mystery topic - honestly, after reading this last blog entry, it's making me sad. I wish I had more concrete news to share with you guys, in any area. So for now, I'm going to keep riding on my hopes & dreams, why not, they've taken me this far.


Melissa Villasenor - America's Got Talent

Hey guys, who watched America's Got Talent this past week, if so, you would've caught Comedian Melissa Villasenor. It looks like she's gearing up for a great run on the show, definitely watch and support her. Remember when I posted her vids on my fb page a while back, I called it first.


Family Affair

I think I'm the child that everyone loves to burn or alteast trys.


Monday, June 6, 2011

Blind Melon

Sometimes I still feel like the little bee girl from the "No Rain" , Blind Melon music video looking for the other bee's to kick it with.

So until that happens, I'm the little bee girl talking shit & flipping muthaf*ckers off !!


Sunday, June 5, 2011

Charlie Ballard @ The Punchline Comedy Club

Outlaugh Comedy Festival 2011 Recap

Yep, congrats to all the performing comics in this year's 2011 Outlaugh Comedy Festival! They were all great and it was an absolute honor and pleasure to be performing along side all of them!

And mad props to activist/comedian Robin Tyler, the first trailblazing queer comedian to hit the L.A. comedy scene in the 70's.

While receiving the Outlaugh Comedy Award, Robin said in 1972, while none of the L.A comedy clubs allowed her to do gay jokes but it was Mitzi Shore, owner of the Comedy Store, that gave Robin the green light to say whatever she wanted on the Comedy Store stage.

I encourage all the LGBT comedians out there to keep going pursuing your dreams no matter where you're at in your comedy career.

No matter how great or small, your work and visibility is important!

Stay fresh!


Outlaugh Comedy Festival 2011 - West Hollywood, CA.

Comedy Store Green Room

me, Arvin, Kathy, and Shawn

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Stefan Pinto

Hey everyone!

I found this cutie in the Frontier Magazine - L.A. Pride issue while I was laying around my hotel room naked eating chocoalate strawberries.

Introducing Stefan Pinto!

Yogurt anyone?

I really love the tag line in this photo: I'd rather go naked than get fat

That's a play on words from PETA's naked ad campaign to not wear fur.

Stefan never use to look like that, he use to be overweight.

"I used to be fat and invisible. Was discovered by a model scout while buying a turkey wrap in a supermarket. Wrote Fat-to-Fit 50: Easy Ways to Lose Weight" .

You guys can see his book and the rest of his info on his website:


Stefan was kind enough to send me this picture for my blog. I could not and I repeat, could not find this print ad anywhere online. So you guys are really lucky to be seeing this!


I really do love Stefan's print ad for Voskos yougurt, I think I just found something to dip my chocoalate strawberries in.