Sunday, October 28, 2012

My eggs are drying up

which is something I hear from aged women who don't have children or who aren't married, see ladies, being a tight goosey doesn't pay off it does it?

Its probably a good thing I was born a man in this life because if I were born a woman I probably would of had 10 kids by 10 different men, either that or have a frequency card for the abortion clinic.

Don't get me wrong, I'm very idealistic but when it comes to lifes little practicalities like becoming a career wife, I just never put much stock into it but now that I'm older, I'm starting to feel a little unfulfilled.

Most women my age who don't have a steady man settle for the next best thing, someone elses man.  I guess I could have been somebodys mistress if I played my cards right but I'm too selfish for that, fuck that sharing shit.

There was this one married guy who I enjoyed flirting with but when his 2nd kid was born, thats when I knew that the attention he gave me was going to be from nil to none.  And you know what, he got mad at me when I deleted him from facebook. Of course I didn't tell him him why, I just thought it'd be better for him to have less distractions in his life while welcoming his new baby.  We never fucked or fooled around, I was just his gay friend who he enjoyed talking nasty with on facebook from time to time.

It looks like I have a theme going here with married men so lets go with that, usually when I start a blog, I never know what I'm going to write about until the threads in my brain begin to unravel and tonight, it looks like its going to be about all the committed men I use to flirt with.

I can think of this cute dorm matron I was into back at HINU which was during my boozing days.  I would come back to the dorm shit faced and visit with him in the dorm office because he worked the graveyard shift.

Thinking back, I had to of been pretty god damn charming because as drunk as I was, I remember holding a pretty good conversation and keeping him there until his shift ended.

We eventually became friends and I use to love flirting with him.  But it got to the point where my friendship with him made his wife feel very uncomfortable and she must've said something to him because after that, he stopped talking to me, which I was really hurt by.  Its not like we were fucking.  I know I had my chances with him because he told me that he use to fuck around on her all the time so getting some from him was never an issue, I just choose not to because I wanted to be his good friend instead.

And you know what hurt more is that I really respected him, I'm sure I could have taken advantage of him when he was having his lows which were mostly due to her but nope, I steered clear.

During this time, I think they were using me as their sexual surrogate, which for me means that because his bitch wife despised me intently, he got some great jealousy sex out of her on account of me, your welcome.

Me being the big facebook stalker I am, I did check up on them just to see how they're doing and they both recently lost a lot of weight, well mainly her, oh, did that come as catty, oh well.

I remember reading my astrology column back then and it said that flirting doesn't constitute a real relationship, its just flirting.

Of course not but also being somebodies 2nd wife doesn't constitute a real relationship either so I'll pass.


*Bonus - for your Charlie Ballard Blog reading enhancement, try playing this Amy Winehouse song below while you read thru this blog, it'll make more sense. Most of them time when I blog about love or emotions, my inspiration usually comes from a song that I was listening to on youtube and tonight it was from Ms. Winehouse.

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