Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Chelsea Lately

Sometimes I really hate the sub conscience because it has a really good way of fucking with you in your dreams.

Take for instance this weird dream I had about Chelsea Handler lastnight.

I don't really care for Chelsea Handler, she is not one of my favorite comedians and I would never ever pay money to see her but that shouldn't suggest that I don't watch her show, "Chelsea Lately" , because I do and that's only because my cable choices are limited, that's why I think everyone should have free world satellite tv, but that's another blog.

Anyhoo, this is how my dream went down, I was in a room and Chelsea was hanging out with her gal pal comedian Sarah Colonna and comedian Mo Mandel.

I remember saying something to Chelsea and she immediately snapped back at me and I was like, "I guess that was kind've funny" .

I can see why Sarah and Mo were in the dream too.

I met Sarah a couple years ago at the Bruce Daniel's comedy show in Silverlake, "Drunk at the Akbar" , and thought she was kind of a snob. I approached Sarah at the bar and was like, "hey, is your name Sarah Colonic" , and she was like, "oh, I never heard that before" , I thought that was so freaking funny. I don't know really know anything about Sarah Colonna other than she's got her head up so far up Chelsea's ass probably because like most actors in L.A., that's how you get work. I've seen Sarah perform and I think she's one of my opposite comedians meaning a lot of comedians don't necessarily like each others jokes because we're either too alike or too different.

I know comedian Mo Mandel from the San Francisco comedy scene and he's done very well for himself. When I was watching him on the Chelsea Lately round table I couldn't help but notice how Chelsea was madly flirting with him, so my guess is that he probably fucked her.

And since I've been in super love with Adele's song, "Someone Like You" , and yesterday I was skirmishing over Adele's Chelsea Lately interview on youtube, I can see how this dream manifested itself.

Why can't I just dream a normal gay person?

Let's take a Freudian look at this dream.

1) I've probably been watching Chelsea Lately because I secretly want my own talk show on E called, "Charlie Ballard Lately" .

2) I desperately want to hang out with Sarah Colonna and be bff's with her so we can have a Haagen Daz fest!

3) I really want to fuck Mo Mandel.

4) Adele really needs to come out with a new album quick so I can move on with my life.

Answers above: 1 & 4


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