Friday, July 30, 2010

Unconditional Love

Unconditional Love. Because of the recent picture I uploaded from the NOH8 campaign, I know I have many facebook & myspace friends who don't believe in gay marriage and as much as it breaks my heart to know many of these wonderful people, Native and Non-Native alike, feel differently when it comes to the same sex marriage issue, I'm okay with that. I respect your opnions and what you believe in.

My only hope is that one day these people will change there minds and see all that we're fighting for is love and happiness, which is why I decided to pose for this picture as if though I were praying.

God Bless.


Wednesday, July 28, 2010

NOH8 Headshot

Hey guys, check out my new headshot by Adam Bouska, for those of you who aren't familar his work, the NOH8 Campaign is a photographic silent protest to bring awareness to the gay marriage movement.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

New Poem

for those of you aren't poets, this poem is about my personal pain, my heart represents the uranium which was mined from the Arizona mountains and how it has contaminated the Colorado River, where most of the poisen lays underneath the river, the environmentalist says it's better to leave the uranium alone because if you try to remove it, it will only cause more pollution, so the mud on top of it protects the river, where with time, becomes reburied again -


River Bed
by Charlie Ballard

Once buried deep inside the 4 sacred mountains,
blackened by granite and time,
now seeps down the crest of blue canyon walls,
unearthed and unprotected

the river, not having
a choice in your discord,
catches you with her bossum,
gently laying you back to sleep

Classy Lady

One of my favorite tv shows on air right now is Housewives of New Jersey. Out've all the Housewives shows on Bravo, this is the only show that caught my interest and held it. I don't know what it is about these NJ Housewives but they're all very charming and very likable. I've tried watching the other Housewife shows but they all they seem contrive, not these girls.

Every show has it's hero and villan, for the NJ Housewives reality star Danielle Staub has been dubbed as the villan. If you follow the show, say what you will but as far as I'm concerned, none of those ladies are perfect, they've all been flagrant at one time or another but maybe that's what America likes about them, I know I do. After all, that's what makes tv interesting, right?. I mean really, who gonna wanna watch some boring Housewive show where all they all do is sit around on their asses and complain about menopause, I know I don't.

So anyhoo, to get back on track. Danielle is one of my favorite cast members, she brought the house down last season with the book confrontation. And since then, the rest of the Housewives cast members have been trying to rub her out, socially of course.

The 2nd season of NJ Housewives has been great so far. Every castmember has become even more luvable the more we watch them.

In the latest incident, Theresa confronted Danielle outside the bathroom at the Fashion show and it lead into a real ugly cat fight. One of the buttons that set Theresa off was when Danielle said, "oh yeah, you're house in fore-closure" ! After the dust settled, Theresa went on camera and said everything was fine and their house was fine.

So today in the yahoo news, Theresa and her husband filed for bankruptcy. Ain't that some shit. I guess Danielle was right. I read that article and it said they're auctioning off there real estate items to try and pay off there huge debt, which was somewhere around 11 million. Holy fucking crap, are you kidding me? I personally owe 500$ on my credit card people and I know that's going to take atleast take 5 years to pay off because I'm on the 10$ a month plan.

So anyone who watches the show is expecting Danielle Stuab to make some negative comments about Theresa's situation at the reunion show. Knowing this, I had to tweet Danielle Staub on Twitter to see what she's going to do. Everyone can think whatever they want about her but I have this gut feeling she's a good person. So I tweeted her to see what she's going to do and here's what she tweeted back!

@daniellestaub just saw Theresa's bankruptcy blog, everyones expecting negative comments from you, don't, show them the classy lady you are

@CharlieBallard I've no interest in kicking someone when they are down Thank you for believing in me love thank you

Well there you have it folks. Was I right or was I right? I can't wait for the reunion show, I'm already making popcorn.


Monday, July 26, 2010

Manic Monday

"Wish it were Sunday... whoo uh oh...
because that's my funday... whoo uh oh..
just another Manic Monday..."

I love the Bangles. This song is dedicated to everyone who doesn't make life drag!

Here's another one of there songs that use to make me scream!


Saturday, July 24, 2010

Rainbow Stand Up Comedy Show

Week 13

Today's weigh in 258
Yay, I lost 2lbs this week, I probably could've lost more if I hadn't splurged on that In & Out burger this past Tuesday. I was really stressin that day so I let it slide. Fortunately I was able to deal with my stress better threw out the rest of the week.
Do you know what's been helping me lately, because I'm an impulse eater, these past couple of weeks everytime I've had the urge to eat something bad, I've had to step back and say to myself, "Moment of Truth" . And just by saying those little words to myself, it makes me back off from buying something greasy and go for the healthier choice. For me, the "Moment of Truth" means that this is one of those times in my life where the balance is going to swing either way and I have to make the conscience choice of which way I want to go. And because I'm really trying to make this diet work, of course I always going to try to go for the high road. Sometimes saying it doesn't always work but for the most part, 90% of the time it does work. It's saved me several times.

Happy Dieting!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Oh hell naw !!

I asked a friend to make a flyer for my upcoming show and this is what he made. At first glance I was like, "Oh hellz no.. is that Kim Jong il right next to me" ?

Great, now I'm the Kim Jong il of stand up comedy. I can see why he put him on my flyer, my mom said he looks like he could've been my dad.

Well one thing is for sure, I hope Kim Jong il isn't what guys are thinking when I'm making them hard.

But you do have to admit, it's a great flyer, it made me chuckle.


Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Tipsy Tuesday

use to have a boss nicknamed Tipsy. She was one of the first bosses I worked for at a small video store in Oakland. She was cool, she was way into Internet chatting before it came popular. I forgot the name of her group but they all pretty much didn't know each other until one of them threw a party, one of which was a Christmas party that she invited me to when I was 19.

Talk about delving into the past. That party was alright but I wasn't. At that time in my life, I was still coming out've my shell. No social skill, no style, no etiquette, and definitely no ballz or knowledge on how to talk to guys.

On that frightful night, Tipsy introduced me to her hot neighbor, where she left me alone with him in his apartment. I forgot his name but he was short, Latino, and hot. I'm pretty sure she introduced me and left me in his place on purpose because she knew he was gay, she knew I was gay, and she probably knew there was a good chance one of us was going to get boned.

Somehow I managed to leave that awkward situation and return to the party. But like the big scared sissy I was and still am, I drank some wine and stumbled back to his front door later on in the night. All I remember was knocking on his door, he opened it, and said he already had somebody with him. Talk about getting shot down huh.

Thanks for reading!

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Charile Ballard Live @ The Dark Room Theater

For Immediate Release:
Charlie Ballard *contact*

Charlie Ballard Live @ The Dark Room Theater
August 12th, 2010 *Thursday*
Mature Content

Comedian Charlie Ballard is a San Francisco Native whose made a splash on the national comedy scene. Charlie's been seen on LOGO, Comedy Central, NBC's America's Got Talent, and has been featured in publications such as the The Indian Country, Campus Magazine and the Advocate Magazine. Charlie's wowed audiences from San Francisco to Toronto, Canada with his slapstick, physical and observational humor. Don't miss out on what is sure to a fantastic evening of fun & stand up comedy!

Dark Room Theater
2263 Mission St.
San Francisco, CA 94110
Doors open at 7:30pm
Showtime @ 8pm
10$ Cover
18 & Over


I'd like to dedicate this song to all my oldie & goodie friends!


Week 12

Today's Weigh in: 260
I'm down 1lb from last week. I'm okay with that. I do have a bright spot, I did one of my fastest runs around the lake this past week.. I know I was moving fast and it was weird, I just had all this energy to pick up the pace and keep it up. My next run the day after wasn't so great but I can see why, I just came down with a head cold and feel lousy. Alright, see you guys next time.


Oh yeah... I have a blog

My bad people, I felt this little energy to let my readers know how I'm doing because I know I haven't blogging like I use to.
Right now everything finally calmed down. My LIVE DVD Taping stand up comedy show has been rescheduled to August 12th at the Dark Room Theater.
So if you're guys are planning on coming out, now you know.
Other than that, just got a head cold and I need some rest.
Peace out!


Sunday, July 11, 2010


My weight loss challenge is a serious thing to me. I want everyone to know that. I didn't start my facebook weight loss challenge to make fans or to try to promote my name. I genuinely started that page so I could track my eating habits and use it as a guide to help curtail what I've been doing wrong. So far, it's been challenging because my weight has really been a yo yo for the past 10 weeks. That's mostly been due to my poor eating habits. Like I'd run 4 times a week and then eat pizza, a phillycheese steak sandwich, cheeseburgers, fries, milkshake, and whatever else thinking my active body would burn those extra calories off, I was so wrong.

Maybe that state of mind might've worked when I was in my teens or possibley in my 20's but I'm in my 30's now and I know my metabolism has slowed down a lot. I know this because I don't even dance at the clubs like I use to.

When I was young club kid, I remember seeing these older queens who looked really good for their age and I asked them how they did it. They said you have to watch what you eat and excercise. They said it gets harder when you get older because your body doesn't process like it use to when you're younger. So I kept that with me all the time.

This blog is about devotion and I need to show my readers and anyone else following my diet challenge that I'm very serious about this. So the only thing I could think of elimating from my fatty ways were my frequent eater stamp cards. So here they are in no particular order.

- My 75% employee meal discount card from work. My work comes out with new menus quarterly and gives there employees a discount card so they can try the new food at a discounted price. This one was a little hard to tear up, I mean really, who can turn down paying for a meal that is 75% off? I think the cheap side of me hung on to this one more than the fat side of me.

- My Japanese Sweets card is from a cute little store on Market street in SF. It's a Japanese store that sells gourmet Japanese treats. This one I'm kind've glad to get rid of, I have to spend a lot of money there to get 10% off in the end. I mostly go to this store to buy distant friends candies and then send it off to them.

- Oh, this next card was really hard to tear up. It was from the PhillyCheese Steak Sandwich shop in Oakland. I absolutely love their sandwiches! They're so yummy. This is probably the place that was kicking my ass the most after my runs, because after I was done jogging, I'd walk into their store, order a sandwich, fries w/chz sauce, and act like a suave about it. They advertise their sandwiches as habit forming and I believe me when I say that is the truth.

- The next card I tore up was from Papalote Mexican grill in SF. This one was easy to tear up because I hardly ever went there.

- Zog Dogs on Market street in SF. I'm not really a hot dog person, *go figure* but I kept this one mostly because there was this really cute guy who worked the counter there. And honestly, I really only went there to check him out. Yup, he was that cute.

- Hot Dog on a Stick in Santa Monica, CA. I am, however a corn dog person! I discovered this place on the Santa Monica Pier a couple years ago when I was on down time from doing comedy shows in L.A. I love there corn dogs, they make them fresh from the batter and they taste crunchy and delish. Not to mention some of there corn dogs counter guys are cute too. Wow, out've all the cards I ripped up, I really wanted to save this one and use it as a reward but you know what... I really think if I just keep this one, I'll be fucking myself up in the long run.

So there it is folks. There's the metaphorical weight I've been holding onto all these years.

And tonight when I stopped at the 7-11 store for a snack, guess what I bought. Instead of buying my usual Hawaiin Punch and candy bar, I bought the Sobe 0 calorie flavored water and the fat free fig newtons.

It's about healthy choices people!


Saturday, July 10, 2010

Week 11

Todays weigh in: 261

I'm cool with that. I really did cut out all the heavy food that I know that's been weighing me down, literally and figuratively.

I'm going to try really hard for the next couple of weeks to stay on this current trend.

My excercise activites are there, I just need to keep cutting back on the food intake.

My old logic of eating was, as long as I'm excercising I could eat whatever I want. I know now that's not true. I can't eat whatever I want. I can't run 2 miles one day, go eat a big philly cheesesteak sandwich afterwards, and then expect to be skinny the next day.

It took a while to realize that, especially since my body doesn't metabolize like it use to. I'm 36 now so that's gotta be expected.

Alright guys, I'm hanging in there and don't plan on giving up anytime soon!

Hot Like Fire

This song is dedicated to all my friends out there who've been in love, who are in love, and who wanna be in love!

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Oscar Grant Verdict

The verdict just came in and officer was found guilty on involuntary manslaughter for the death of Oscar Grant. In case anyone is not caught up on this, this goes back to New Year's Eve when a BART police officer mistakenly killed Oscar with a gun, instead of using his taser, which is what he thought he was reaching for.

This incident happened at the Fruitvale BART station, which is the same BART train station that I commute to work everyday. I got home today and noticed the Fruitvale BART plaza has boarded it's merchants stores anticipating a riot from today's verdict.

So now we're playing the waiting game to see if Oakland & SF is going to riot. Since Oakland is made up 60% of African Americans and Oscar Grant was African American, it's their community whose is affected by this mostly. But also, the outcome affects the rest of the African American U.S. population at large because the verdict reflects the current relations between black americans and the U.S. government.

Does any of this sound familar? The parallels between different american race groups who've been mistreated by our system is uncanny.

I'm not saying it was a good thing when black people rioted during the Rodney King trial but those extreme demonstrations did change how the system handles unfair outcomes in the U.S. court system.

So we'll see how everyone handles this.


Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Losing it with Jillian

Did anyone watch "Losing it With Jillian" on NBC lastnight? This week Jillian goes to the Yavapai/Apache Tribe in Campe Verde, AZ. to help the tribe lose weight. I'm watching the show and its making me cry. That's exactly how Native people are when it comes to change. I really hope all of Native America can get a c...hance to watch that episode! xoxo

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Psychic Reading

Sometimes I enjoy a good psychic reading every once in a while because gosh darn it, they're just so entertaining.

I was chatting on facebook this evening with my friend Eva and she was saying, "remember what that psychic lady said to you a long time ago that you're going to be, 'the wave of the future'" .

That's exactly what I needed to hear this week. Believe it or not, those little metaphysical lines of inspiration stick with me for a long time.

At first I didn't remember what she was talking about and when she said the KU Halloween party, it all came back to me.

That was a fun night, KU was having a Halloween carnival on there campus and we thought we'd swing by to check it out. While standing in line for to get a tarot card reading, there was this guy wearing a long black trechcoat in front of us, we asked him what his costume was and he said it was something like from an obscure character in the 1940's. Not to us, we told him he looked like a terrorist and then he immediately took him coat off.

So we kept waiting in line and finally got to see the oracle. She was good. For me, what I remember most from that evening is pulling the Leo card, it had to do with my other Hualapai friend, Truman. And what's funny about that, prior to that psychic reading, I kept telling Truman that she was in the Leo time of her life.

Here's how the birthchart breaks down for everyone.
0-7 Aries
7-14 Tauras
14-21 Gemini
21-28 Cancer
28-35 Leo
35-42 Virgo
and so on...

This is from a really cool birthchart I read somewhere in an astrology book, it's basically saying the best time for you to be your sign is when it corresponds to whatever year you're in. The only really suckie thing about it is the last sign of the zodiac is Aquarius and the time to be an Aquarius is in your 70's. That's gotta suck. But then again, ask me again how I feel when I get to that age.

So anyhoo, I just now realized I'm in the Virgo time of my life. So right now I'm learning all the values & virtues of being a Virgo. From what I know, they're pretty hardworking people. That's good to know because I still know I have so much comedy work a head of me.

Alright guys, see ya next time!


Saturday, July 3, 2010

Week 10

Today's Weigh in: 265

Am I surprised? No, I've been food binging for the past couple of days and I've been trying to work out my angst.

I still have an upbeat attitude and have 4 months left on this dieting trek. Thank goodness I gave myself a good stretch of time to do this.

Hopefully I'll be able to manage my stress better in the future!

Alright guys, happy dieting!


My New Stand Up Clip

Please pass this on to your friends and family!


Get Money

This use to be one of my songs at the club back in the day.


Friday, July 2, 2010

So much negative out there

I was walking to the store earlier today and became overwhelmed with all the negative energy in the world. It was an ugly feeling, I became upset, frustrated, & helpless all at the same time.

Luckily I had some pringles on hand and was able to eat those bad feelings away. And in case any of my catty friends are reading this, no, I was not feeling upset, frustrated, & helpless because my pringle can was almost empty.

I wasn't planning on running tonight but I think might have to considering how crappy I feel. I could probably meditate but I usually do that late at night right before I go to sleep.

Tonight we were gonna head out to the 3 Lodge Powwow in Manteca but it's too hot, so instead we're going to stay in, order pizza, and watch the Gathering of Nations Powwow 2010 DVD we ordered a couple months back. I know huh, we're gonna get our powwow on somehow tonight.

Stay cool everyone!