Monday, January 11, 2010

Not Racist, Just Pissed

Howdy Partners! I'm in a venting mood so I'm going to vent. It's probaly not going to help that I've been sick with the flu and now a cold for the past month but out it must come.

Not racist, just pissed. I hope I didn't put any of my non-natives readers off with my last blog comments about White people. For anyone not in the know or who hasn't been reading my blogs, lately I was talking about how people can be two faced and I was saying that was a White person attribute. That statement isn't entirely all that true. I've run into many two faced people from different places. I was just generalizing and was probaly using Whitey as the scapegoat. So my bad to all my Vanilla chai peeps out there! I can't help it, I think I might be one of those ethnic people who blame all my shit on white people, can you blame me?

Speaking of race, lately my comedy has been veering away from the race topic because it can make some of my comedy audiences feel uncomfortable. So these past two years I've been concentrating on being more goofy and silly. And besides, I think it's the comedians job to make sure there audiences forget their daily troubles and not be reminded of them.

But since this is my blog, I want to share some of my personal experieces about race growng up in the Bay Area. As many of you know, I attended Native boarding schools from 14-29. And that's all I've ever known since I graduated from college. When I wasn't away at school and hit my 20's, I really really really tried to socialize with other groups like the Black queens in Oakland but most of them were so unfriendly to me. I always went to the Bench and Bar every sunday to watch the Black dragshow showcases. And everytime I'd strike out trying to get to know any of them. And then at the same bar, they had the Latin Explosion themed night on Friday's, same difference. I'd go there every Friday and Lambada with those Mexican queens hoping to befriend several of them, and notta. But of course, do you guys know where my social clique happened to me, it was at Native boarding schools. I can't keep telling you guys about the kindness and compassion that Native people have for each other. Maybe that was the problem. Maybe it was because I wasn't Black or Mexican that those social cliques wouldn't open their community to me. Back then I did have white dragqueen friend who I was cool with. Her name was Angel and that girl was a handful. She was pretty much the only white dragqueen who hung out with the rest of those black dragqueens. She really was my in with them and after she took me and Juicely to Ho stroll, we got to know some of the other girlz. I really do miss Angel, I haven't seen her in years. Most likely she's either in jail or dead.

Tonight, I walking through the Castro I saw this Black dragqueen that I should've been friends with a long time ago. And we just walked by each other without even a wince. That's really where this whole blog was inspired from.

I know, some of you guys are like,"why did you want to hang out with dragqueens in the first place, wasn't there a knitting group you could've joined or something" . You guys are right but back then I didn't know any better. I was young and attracted to the glitz and glamour of stage performance. It wasn't a total loss hanging out with the Black girls, by watching them time in and time out every Sunday working the stage, they're the ones who taught me how to have nerve and how to be fearless in front of a crowd. And tonight when I saw that girl, I really wish I could've told her that, but what would've been the point? We're all older now and have different lives. And now that I have a life, I'm going to fight for what's mine, as I know they would too. Let's see, did I learn anything from hanging out with the Mexican queens every Friday on Salsa night, hmmmm, let me think? Actually yeah, I learned from those girls where to find a really good taco truck.

Alright ya'll, I feel a lot less guarded and lonley than I did before, thanks for sharing this with me. And as far as me hanging out with different social groups, I think I can calmly say that I'm still open to getting to know all kinds of people and hopefully the all of you guys will have the courage and openess to return the favor, not just to me but to everyone else too!


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